LOCAL GOVERNMENT

 
   

CNESTHREE CHEERS FOR ANGUS GRAHAM!!! At last the Audit Commission are to look into the workings of the Comhairle. Everyone Amadan speaks to in the Western Isles thinks there is merit in an investigation and if our mail box is anything to go by, the Audit Commission should take a very large magnifying glass with them. If the electorate thinks fishy things are going on, why oh why, do the councillors not? (Except for Angus Coir of course).

We'll not go into things very deeply as solicitors are expensive but............. Council Road Contracts (increased from the usual 2 to 5 years after local contractors had been eliminated)......Lochs School (who else would build a community school in a peat bog in the middle of nowhere?) .......Berneray Causeway (Bad rock used - plus, they got EC money for the causeway as it would shorten the Sound of Harris crossing with a new terminal in Berneray - where is it despite tonnes of rock being moved to Bays at taxpayers expense) IF WE DIDN'T LAUGH WE'D CRY. Keep going Angus, you've more support than you think!

 

 

HIGHLAND COUNCIL HANGING BASKET LEAGUE

           
  BEAULY 85 PORTREE 0  
  DRUMNADROCHIT 28 PORTREE 0  
  FORT WILLIAM 204 PORTREE 0  
  NEWTONMORE 36 PORTREE 0  
  KINGUSSIE 26 PORTREE 0  
  KYLE 34 PORTREE 0  
  INVERNESS 280 PORTREE 0  
  AVIEMORE 40 PORTREE 0  
  DINGWALL 44 PORTREE 0  
  NAIRN 62 PORTREE 0  
 
NEW APPOINTMENTS TO THE COMHAIRLE
 
Chief Exec.

Comhairle nan Eilean Siar have appointed Ray Bowyer (Castaway 2000) to the post of Chief Executive Designate.

The Convener, Alex MacDonald, welcomed the appointment of Mr Bowyer and said that his experience of living in the islands and the fact that he's probably the only one who can scare the present incumbent out of his office, as being crucial to his success. Mr Bowyer, 55, says he is delighted to be appointed and looks forward to leading the council into the new millenium.

He brings a wealth of relevant experience to the post including press evasion, arguing, drinking, swearing, fighting, and having at least half a page of Stornoway Gazette column space dedicated to himself for a minimum three weeks in a row.

CNES have also announced the appointment of Highland psychic Swein MacDonald to the post of "Comhairle nan Eilean Seer". A spokesperson for the council told Amadan that the appointment was a cost cutting exercise as it is hoped that Mr MacDonald will forsee any new scandal coming the councils way before the likes of Angus Graham finds out and causes another stooshie.

Amadan attempted to interview Mr MacDonald about his new job but neighbours told us he left in a hurry five minutes before we arrived.

 

WHO IS IT?

 
Is it Katie M MacKenzie wearing a dress she bought in Mary Bremner's shop in 1970? Is it George Lonie having had the Chief Executive of CalMac throw a plate of spagetthi bolognaise, green peas and sweetcorn over his head? Is it Donald Manford wearing the new Bishop's cassock? Is it Ian M MacLeod wearing a tie he bought in MacIver and Dart? It's certainly not No. 13 Murdo 'Maroot' MacLeod who looks a bit pale.

Can you tell who Amadan is making the DIN about? Go and have a look........

The Comhairle

(*Donald, I had to repay you for all the hits I got after you mentioned Amadan on 'Coinneach Mor')

 

C OH, NO THEY AREN'T. OH,YES THEY ARE!

 
Neil GalbraithAmadan can exclusively reveal that Comhairle nan Eilean are to break up from their year long theatrical soiree to hold a special Christmas Panto. Details are sketchy at the moment but from what our mole tells us Murdo Murray (Technical Services) has been cast as 'Pinochio' (was going to be 'Snow-white but the jury's still out), Donald John MacSween as the 'Sunday Fairy', Angus Graham and Donald Manford as the ugly sisters and making a special appearance in his first panto, Neil Galbraith as 'Bugs Everybody'.

We also hear that Disney are to film a new episode of the Fox and the Hound in the White House - we wonder who'll be starring?!

More details will follow as we hear them....

 

RETIREMENT PACKAGE.....
 
  Who shall have a fishy
On a little dishy
Who shall have a sturgeon
When HIS boat comes in?
 

 

DOWNLOAD THE COMHAIRLE MOLE
 

The White house 'mole' has been busy for the last while and even got the press banned from the Press Room. See if you can catch it!

are you a?